When Time Matures Into Light

Margus Heilä

I was born in 1968 in Estonia, into a non-religious family surrounded by atheistic Soviet culture. During my high school years, I began contemplating the meaning of life. A person is born, suffers, and dies - what is the point of it all?
A friend of mine introduced me to Eastern religions, which teach that we must live through reincarnations to reach enlightenment and break free from this earthly cycle. This led me to pursue enlightenment through spiritual and physical practices and to delve deeply into Buddhist and Taoist literature.
In the 1990s, after Estonia gained freedom from Soviet occupation, it became possible to discuss spiritual matters openly. At a friend's suggestion, I decided to attend confirmation classes. As a result, I joined the Estonian Evangelical Lutheran Church and began working in diaconal ministry.
I studied theology and was ordained as a deacon, which, in Estonia, is equivalent to an assistant pastor. I served as the pastor of a small congregation in southern Estonia until we moved to Finland.
In Finland, I actively participated in the activities of several Christian denominations but grew increasingly troubled by the divisions among Christians. In sermons and literature, preachers who claimed to be anointed by the same Holy Spirit often presented conflicting teachings. I prayed to God to reveal the truth to me.
Delving into Catholic theology profoundly transformed my perspective, prompting me to reach out to a priest in a Catholic parish. I participated in a year-long catechesis (similar to Lutheran confirmation classes), and in 2011, I was received into the Catholic Church.
My own aging and work with the elderly have shaped the foundation for creating this book.